as i walked into my office this morning with just a towel and a bigmoose hoody on, possibly for subliminal inspiration, but more than likely just to keep me warm, i thought about how writing this blog is cathartic for me.

now i have just reread that opening sentence, and i must add i have a home office, and it wasn't 'dress as david beckham' friday, in case you were wondering, such a strong look, but not one i can pull off!

the catharsis, which as the dictionary states is the purification and purgation of emotions, is something that allows me to write about a whole mix of stuff, and hopefully you guys keep clicking on a friday morning, our readership keeps growing btw, so thank you lovely readers for returning weekly, and new subscribers, welcome, i hope we can satiate your appetite for a jolly good read.

i can't guarantee it will alway be good, but i can guarantee it will always be raw, real, and sometimes relevant, as my friend georgina jones says it has to be.

so 52, what's that all about?

it's a cliche but i don't actually feel like i'm 52, my body seems to be holding up quite well, kiss of death there you watch, and mentally i am still so immature it hurts, our family whatsapp has an unwritten rule that whatever goes on whatsapp stays on whatsapp, as the outside world would be ringing social services, and local purveyors of straightjackets were the contents to be shared, such is the smith family weirdness.

so all in all not a lot has changed since i was a kid, apart from less hair, i still love sport, i still love music, i am extremely passionate, i wanna change the world, and i don't conform very well.

nope, 18 year old jeff hasn't changed much at all really.

point in case, this week i was invited to go to meet dr beverley morgan, or bev as i am allowed to call her now, bevlar will be introduced the next time i see her, but i thought bev was good progress for a first meeting.

bevlar, as i will call her here, as i don't think she reads the blog, gawd help me if she starts, invited me to go to meet her at the welsh government building where she works, to discuss in particular tackling poverty, and tackling child poverty, which immature jeff worried that she had got me mixed up with someone else, but fortunately 52 year old jeff kicked in and told me to grow up and take my responsibility seriously, so i wore shoes.

i arrived early for our 10 o'clock, and as i drove up to the gate, a middle aged man with a fashionably coutured jacket in a fabric with a high degree of luminescence stood holding a clipboard.

clipboards are like kryptonite to me, i judge people with clipboards before i even meet them, which is so wrong, they may be lovely people, and go home to lovely families, and lead lovely lives, but for judgemental jeff, repent ye all my sins, i judge them.

'good morning', i smiled my best smile, 'i have an appointment with dr beverley morgan', hoping leaving the bevlar gag for future bants, and focusing on the time it took bev to get the dr title, would impress my nemesis, hiviz man.

i knew bev's time spent studying to get her title wouldn't cut it, and hiviz man was having no smiling, not on his watch, no sir.

'have you booked parking?' he barked.

'no, i'm afraid i haven't, i wasn't told to.'

this was like seb and david hearing we had won the rights to hold the 2012 Olympics for hiviz man, his joy was palpable.

his turn to smile, but not in the manner that i had, his was a smile of power.

'you can't park here then, you'll have to park on the street and pay for it, it gets pretty busy mind you' he so very kindly informed me.

i glared, but spoke not a word.

we both knew hiviz man had won this battle, but battles are not wars, and i do not give in easily, but i know when i have to retreat, and i turned my swedish mode of transport around, and hunted a place to tether my motorised steed to.

fees paid i walked towards my meeting.

there was a substitute hiviz man stood now where my combatant had been, and this one smiled in a genuine way, 'morning' i offered, 'morning' he replied, and normal service resumed.

i noticed the huge, beautiful welsh government insignia on the wall and thought to myself, about the boy from finsbury park being invited to talk about poverty, and possibly getting that 18 year olds dream to help change the world, and a pride of where my life was and how i had grown into this mature adult who people actually wanted to listen to, and i felt good, i felt in a good place, until, just as i approached my destination's glass doors, i noticed the kryptonite kid sitting in his little security box and he was glaring at me with that 'i made you turn your car around and go hunt down a car park space, and pay money for it, and then have to walk back here' look on his face, and as i passed where his face was inches from mine i said 'cock' out loud, and carried on walking as if nothing happened.

i may be 52, i may have adult children, i may take my role in society very seriously, but unfortunately i don't like losing, and the symbolism of hiviz man being in his little box wasn't wasted on me.

bevlar was lovely, and we are going the change the world together, and my dream of leaving the world better than when we found it continues.

today i am meeting the leader of cardiff council phil bale, at city hall, to discuss my big plan for sustainability, so wish me luck, and i am going to park in the nearest ncp, just to be safe :)

so that was my week, oh and i just remembered i met michelin star chef james sommerin who for some reason i had a preconceived idea was gonna be aloof, but turned out to be delightful, and hopefully i will be doing some work with him on a some future projects, how exciting, so watch this space.

oh and i ran 100k as well. 

so until next week, have a great time, love one another, do good things, help others, and do a monthly moose if ya can, i will be attending an anger management course.

so until next week, i'll be seeing ya,

blue skies,

jeff





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