04:41 and i can't sleep.

oh well, let's get up and write my blog, what will i write about today?

no qualms about content today!

5 days to go.

120 hours.

7200 minutes.

432000 seconds, and they are slipping by very quickly.

until when?

well before i tell you until when, please accept my apologies for not even saying good morning, i think there is a level of excitement and expectation, mixed with coffee numero deux, that is causing me to rush ahead of myself.

so let's start again quietly and calmly.

good morning bigmoose chums.


i really can't do quietly and calm this morning, i only have five days to go!!!

now for those members of the world who have stumbled across this blog whilst looking for information on canadian animals, or are researching stefan sattlers report about alaska and it's four legged, antler adorned mammals http://www.mooseworld.com/mooseman/index.htm, i apologise, google has led you to a very different world, this is a world in which i jeff smith have the aforementioned five days to wait until my life changes.

life on the 29th of march will see me heading to heathrow, and completing my abstention from eating chocolate based confectionery. 

specifically twirls.

long term friends and blog readers will be aware of my penchant for said two fingered chocolate treat, though possibly not aware of quite why a love of my life, is removed so callously before every adventure i embark on.

i am a strong willed man, and i have a gene inside me which is determined, driven, and works hard to reach my goal, whatever that may take.

so whenever i embark on a physical adventure that requires strength in body and mind, i remove things that can be detrimental to my progress, namely chocolate and booze.

booze is no biggy, as i can take or leave booze, but its cause and effect on me as i train mentally and physically is an obvious no no, chocolate however takes grit and doggedness to contain.

so it came to pass that in december i aimed toward a himalayan goal, and decided to cut chocolate from my diet 100%.

no cadburys stocking for this adventurer, no sneaky yule logs for this explorer.

i clawed my way through the festive season proud that not one cocoa based treat was consumed.

why specifically do i do this to myself, and does it really make a difference?

what it does is prove to myself that i can do anything i set my mind on, and when i am alone in my house and the shiny purple wrapper literally whispers to me, attempting to seduce me, as adam was seduced in that sunny garden at the beginning of time, i am steadfast in my resolve.

no, i will not succumb to your delicious gustatory sensations, and the thought of you melting in my mouth as i taste you, we both know how good you taste, you cannot and will not stop me on the path to my dream.

and so it continues, as i pay for my fuel, i hear the soft voice, drawing me closer as i notice the purple glow in the waist high rack.

as i wander the supermarket aisles, like man made valleys, i see the purple sparkle.

but i am strong, and i will not give in.

until heathrow.

heathrow is my time.

if i can make heathrow i have won.

and so my goal is in sight.

heathrow, and specifically w h smith in heathrow, which is my chocolate utopia.

as i check my luggage full of high altitude clothing, boots and crampons, ice axes and the like, i know i am close.

close to welcoming her back into my life, and as i self scan the first twirl i will have touched for over a season, it feels good, and psychologically i have been strong of will, and i am ready.

i toyed with writing about eating the first twirl to have touched my lips for almost 100 days, but felt it would definitely dive into double entendre, so will leave you to imagine that taste sensation yourself, sometimes imagination can be equal if not better than reality.

oh yeah, and i'm off to climb everest.

as the cursor flashes on my screen, i sit, still, contemplating the power of the sentence above.

wow, this is a huge chapter in my life.

ha ha i just breathed so deep, it almost scared me.

i am gonna struggle to write exactly how i am feeling now, as there are some very deep rooted emotions flying around the place, but what i will say is that i have set out my stall, made the decision that i want to return to the beautiful world of nepal, and with the permission of sagarmatha, i will hopefully climb to her summit, and look at the stunning views that she has to offer, and then i will return home to show the world her beauty, and proffer up my story to show an example of how anyone can achieve their dreams if they work hard, do their best, and never ever give up, and hopefully inspire people to do things they may not have done, and therefore sharing my story in a way that makes our world better one person at a time, and if the schoolchildren's responses to our storytelling is anything to go by i think we are on the right path.

i have so many people i would like to thank for helping me get back to everest, but my expedition guide russell brice must be singled out, as it is he who has allowed me to continue on this journey, and as the man i will now put my life literally in his hands, there is no man on mount everest i would trust more, and it is strange how life goes, and there is a part of me that wonders if some things are just meant to be, and how he and i have met for a reason, and the next 70 or so days will tell.

i feel like i could write so much today, i am so energised, but i realise this is probably a mix of caffeine and adrenaline, so i will refrain, but i will try to get a blog written while i am away to keep you updated, but please bear with us if it doesn't land with you on time.

we will be posting stuff on social media and our everest website, so please come along on the journey, hopefully you can enjoy it too, i am really looking forward to sharing some of the beauty of this expedition with you.

today i have four different catchups with important people in my life, and i have listened to alan arnette and connected with nearest and dearest as i head towards the highest point on our planet, and i have found it quite funny how as i have hugged loved ones goodbye, the hugs have been decidedly longer in duration than normal, consistently, funny huh?

so wish me luck, i will do my best, and thank you for reading my scribings, and supporting me and bigmoose on this wonderful journey that we are taking together.

much love, and blue skies,